Thursday Thought — Which Kind of Controller Is He?

A Cry For Justice

Almost everyone gets a little controlling sometimes.  We all can get caught up in wanting things done in a particular way: here’s how to fold a towel, here’s when to shift the gears.  We want to say, “What are you doing? Here, do it like this.”

So when does controlling behavior become a problem?  There are people whose control is a bad habit (“annoying controllers”) and people whose control is a style they are committed to (“coercive controllers” or “bullies”).  How do you know which category your partner fits into?

The key difference is that the annoying controller doesn’t retaliate against you when you tell him to stop controlling you.  The coercive controller, on the other hand, is angry when you resist his control, acts entitled about it, and gets you back for standing up to him.  And if you continue to refuse to give in, he gets nastier and…

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About Dale Ingraham @ Speaking Truth In Love Ministries

We started Speaking truth in love Ministries to address the issue of sexual abuse within the faith community. My wife, Faith, is a survivor of many years of abuse by her father who was a pastor at the time. We go into churches, colleges and conferences to speak about this issue.
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